It started as just a normal conversation at the checkout.
“Hello how are you?”
“Good, thanks.”
“Much on today?”
“Yes, a few things.”
“Are you retired yet?”
“Um. No.”
Not only am I nowhere near the government’s desired retirement age, I certainly don’t look like I am either, according to my wife and several other people who don’t lie.
My point, though, is why do people who don’t know you well feel that they can say things like that? It generally is about your physical appearance, your age, occupation or domestic situation. I floated the topic to my social media friends and got an overwhelming reaction.
The number one clanger is: “When are you due?” or “Are you having a baby?” This obviously happens to females who are carrying a bit of weight around the tummy. The bluntest response, and most honest, was: “No, I am not pregnant. I’m just fat”.
Men are certainly not immune from the weight issue. A former radio colleague was once asked how he became involved at a footy club. He said he was running laps around the oval a few years ago, and they asked him to play. The person looked at his current physical condition and said: “Clearly you have not run a lap here since”. Ouch!
One friend told of her experience when someone referred to a school as being a “bit too Asian”. The friend has been married to a Chinese man for 13 years and has three children attending that school. Whoops indeed.
What about when you run into someone and they say: “Gee, you have aged.” Is it bad manners to suggest they haven’t looked into a mirror very closely lately?
Many people are having children later in life, and the number of people who have told me they get asked about their grandchild – actually their child – is quite staggering.
I find it amazing that some people feel it is OK to say these things. I would like to hear of your experiences.
■ What do you think? Post a comment below
■ If you have any news or events, let me know at kevin@howdypartnersmedia.com.au
